I was young to get engaged - 21
I was young to get married - 22
I'm young to be trying to get pregnant - 23 (as of today, in fact!)
"So what's the rush", as people always ask?
1) when I met Brad, I'd never met a Christian man like him. He was perfect for me. I was surprised every time I learned more about him, finding more and more things that compliment my personality, likes, habits, perspectives, family history, faith journey, etc. Not that we're exactly the same at all, but compliment is the key word. And he does. He was the one, why wait?
2) When I met Brad the timing was right. I was done university, we both had full-time jobs, and he was the crutial 4 years older than me, making us ready at the same time to get engaged (isn't it great how it took that extra 4 years to bring us to the right place?! Oh boys to men....)
3) A long engagement didn't suit us. He lived in Montreal, I lived in Hamilton. Our work was waiting for us in Montreal, and we chose not to live or sleep together before marriage. Our wedding wasn't outrageously expensive and we divided up paying for our wedding into 1/3 for each of our parents and of course us, so saving up for us or our parents wasn't as necessary as if we had a really big and expensive wedding and it was put on one person. 6 months engagement was fine, and so we were married - 6 months after getting engaged, 1 year after beginning to date, 17 months after meeting each other
4) Starting young suits the family we're dreaming of. We've always wanted a medium-large sized family. 3-4 kids is our dream. We also want them fairly close together (1-2 years apart each, max, ideally of course). Also, even if we get pregnant immediately, Brad will be 28 when our first child is born, and I, 24 (approx). I would love to be done having babies in my early 30's, if not by 30. Maybe a pipe dream, but that's what we're talking about here - our dream scenario.
5) We believe we're ready. We had some scares (read: thought we were pregnant and didn't know that we were ready) early on in our marriage. Think one month in...and oops, my periods late. And yes, I did forget the pill from time to time... Though I was terrified, Brad rose to the occasion like a Saint. He reminded me that God is in control, that we love each other and have people in our lives who we can watch and learn Christian parenting from... He was a dream! a day later, my monthly friend came. But my perspective changed.
That was nearly a year ago, and since then we have had other "Near-Child Experiences" that made us realize if it did hap[pen, we could handle it, and we started to get attached to the idea as well. This summer we had a "Near-Child Experience" though we were not yet trying and still using the pill. Only a short 24 hours of thinking it could happen, but about a million emotions flooding our minds. And then my period came. This time we cried. If that was as hard as it was, how hard will a miscarriage be? I pray against that experience, but statistics tell me it could easily happen to me. Yet, through these experiences, we believe we are ready, and are eager to join the baby bump ranks :)
6) My mom is one of my heroes. I love my mom, I admire her parenting, I loved my childhood, my sister and I are close as a result, I believe, of her parenting skills in raising us to play together, be best friends, kiss and hug each other when we're sad, etc. She stayed home with us for a few years before going back to work (something I've been thinking about lately and what we'll do in that regard). Mom was young when she met my Dad. He's sweet, blond and blue-eyed, hard working, and so handsome... so she fell for him, getting married at 22, and being done her child-rearing days at 25 when I was born. Is there anything wrong with wanting to be like your mom? I hope not :) The times have changed, but she's still heroic to me, so if God wills, I'll follow those foot steps.