tidbit about infant adoptions

I read today that 55% of infant adoptions are now "open", meaning that the birth mother (and/or father) are somewhat involved in the child's life. Open adoptions can range anywhere from once a week visits to an occasional phone date between parents for medical background information. The idea is, in one way or another, the door is open to the birth family. It can be really helpful in terms of knowing your adoptive child's full story (about their relatives, family history, medical info, lineage, etc), but also really confusing for the child and maybe harder for them to fully bond with their forever family.

It makes sense that the rates for open adoptions are drastically higher with infant adoptions. In most cases of infant adoption, the birth mother willfully gives up her child for adoption because she doesn't want to, or cannot raise him or her. With the adoption of older kids, specifically from foster care, it wouldn't be as common since the parents have had parental rights severed. In some cases they're not allowed anywhere near their birth children. So open adoption isn't even an option. 

At this point, I'm inclined to want a 100% closed adoption. I'm sure because of the type of adoption we're pursuing, that will be the natural case anyway, but you never know.

Would you want an option adoption?
Would you even consider it?


  1. Maggie24.3.12

    Hey Em! I know I'm not overly researched in adoption, open or closed, but I think that open adoptions are showcased quite well on MTV's 16 and Pregnant, in the first season with Catelynn and Tyler. Definitely gives some good perspective from both sides.

  2. Mackenzie27.3.12

    Hi. I just stumbled across your other blog from pinterest. I am not usually one to comment but I felt like I should cause I was once in your shoes. My husband and I are also in the ministry field. :) We have 3 kids whom all were adopted and we have an open adoption. Open adoptions are not anything at all like you see on tv shoes. You are the parent and you have to decide what you feel is best for your child. Our oldest is 5 and up until he was 3 we would see his birthmother a few times a year. We have a good relationship with her and I truly believe that God put her in our lives so we could be a light to her. 3 years ago she texted me saying that she went in to have an abortion and that it was twins and they wouldn't do it at that facility. I called her and we talked and by the grace of God they were saved and we now have them both. We haven't seen her in over a year because its what we feel is best for our kids now. We still email pictures or text every once in awhile. When we started the adoption journey we never wanted an open adoption because we didn't want a birthmother but God changed our hearts and I'm glad he did.
    Sorry I posted a book but feel free to email me if you want. :)

    1. Thank you both so much!

      Maggie, I'm going to watch those videos soon. I think it'll be good for me.

      And Machenzie, I so appreciate you sharing your story. It's given me a lot to think about. ps - just e-mailed you :)